An unusual start to the year

In a somewhat unexpected turn of events my first post of the New Year comes to you from ward 17 of the Borders General Hospital. Dry January got off to a convincing start with a 24 hour pre operative alcohol ban and I have been nil by mouth since last night. Take that Christmas weight gain….. Nothing sinister. A recurring perforated eardrum in 2022 led a rather charming Spanish locum at the hospital to tut vigorously and declare that my ear problem would never be properly fixed with a “nose like that”. Having then dissed my tonsils as “minuscule” (I really took to the woman, she minced no words and washed no hogs) I was put on the ENT waiting list for a septum straightening.  Years passed and then out of the blue they rang on the 23rd to see if I still wanted it done. In fact the ear has been a bit better since so I vacillated but in the end decided to give it a go. And here I am, third on the list…

In many ways a period of sofa based convalescence will be a pleasant corrective to a rather highly charged Hogmanay.  A first foray to the butchers to pick up the usual three bird roast garnered no fodder. It was not ready but promised for Hogmanay collection. Alas, on the day the available goose was declared “suspicious” by Jim the butcher. He undertook to substitute two ducks and this led to a somewhat surreal speculation as to whether this would be delivered as a single item with four legs and whether there might be scope for a larger, three duck version with six wings, six legs and a rabbit’s head and antlers grafted on for aesthetic interest. (In the end we took delivery of two, conventionally legged roasts which were delightful). By way of further entertainment, Number One Son and Best Amigo contributed a New Landrover Stuck in Field incident. This provided much towing and leaning on fence fun for guests and neighbours but all efforts were fruitless and it remained firmly stuck, with the door dangerously close to a large straining post . A temporary electric fence was erected in case the cows decided to move in and the car removal team returned wearily to base to “phone a friend”.  Parental emotions ran high at this point but “wellbeing triage” (and a steady stream of cook’s beer) courtesy of the New Year Guests brought Chef Keith more or less back onto an even keel. First thing on New Year’s Day we were all out (other than Keith who stuck to sleeping off the hangover), watching a lovely chap in a stunningly red beard “precision winch” the stuck vehicle past a perilously close straining post.  All present (self excluded naturally) have now contracted an acute case of winch envy……

With Keith in the kitchen for the Hogmanay Feast I took to the greenhouse and cleaned off and potted up the dahlias I’ve been drying off in the tool shed. We lost most of them last year so I’m trying a new method, copying a lady on instagram, potting them in spent compost and topping off with a bit of insulation (this year a mix of confidential shredding and the woolly sheets that come with chilled food deliveries – in this case the Christmas ham). I shall report back in due course. Recycling/waste reduction has been quite the theme this year. Most of the left over ham and turkey was decanted into what I am calling “The Great Pie of Christmas)” – recipe incoming. I have also squirrelled some into the freezer for a future biryani. The strange wiggly legs of the mutant Christmas parsnips were pickled in raspberry vinegar served on a warm mushroom salad. I even zested the crate of oranges we were juicing for breakfast at every opportunity and the lovely orange curly stuff went into everything and anything soda bread, smokey orange tea, another beetroot salmon cure, oxtail casserole….

Anyway – I’m off to don the compression socks….